#randomprose: Insomnia(c) 1-4-2016

Today was my first work day in 2016 and it seemed extremely long and tiring… I thought my eyes were going to shut and never open again. After some fun celebratory activities during the holidays, I got used to going to sleep well after midnight. Last night, I sincerely tried to do so before 11 pm. My brain didn’t agree though. We (my brain was acting like a separate entity) stayed awake until 2:30 am. Perhaps, even longer – I just lost track of time, eventually. I woke up at 6:30 to get ready for work. Been awake ever since. This lack of sleep is a dangerous addiction!

Back in school, it was fun, cool and even sort of, kind of, popular between us kids to be constantly half-asleep – all of us artists, poets, musicians wanna-be’s. We talked about those few hours we slept every night, almost proud, if the number was less than 5. Which, more commonly than not, truly was. We were all tired; slightly, romantically depressed, filled with this sparkling energy inside that kept on bursting out no matter what, waiting for the classes to be over so we could go out and “play”. That we did – at the school theater, social events, local concerts, and just out there, in the city and beyond. By the time we were home (which meant, very often, not our own home, per se), we’d need to eat some sort of dinner, shower and go to sleep, but that didn’t always happen. Not in that order, at least. Though I’d always choose shower over dinner, if time until next get-together was limited. Because you can always munch on something while in action, but you can never get away with smelly socks or other unmentionables.

Nowadays, the situation is rather opposite. Lack of sleep means less concentration, long days at work, tiredness while driving, etc etc. Even simple functioning, as a grown up human being, becomes more complicated. Brain is filled with molasses mixed with cotton candy. I don’t need drugs or antidepressants – all those “glitter world” effects can simply be achieved with good ol’ lack of sleep. Sounds fun? It isn’t, really. Not when you’re past your mid-20s. What’s there, awaiting ahead? Only time will show.


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